elsecall: (022.)

[personal profile] elsecall 2025-11-28 11:52 pm (UTC)(link)

Jasnah lasts longer in the cot than she expects.

She lies there as the room slowly pales with dawn, listening to his increasingly sluggish humming, her eyes still closed, her hands folded in identical positions whenever she wakes from the brief, sharp jolts of half-sleep. Once or twice in the night she had startled — just slightly — shoulders tightening, breath catching, as if surfacing from a cold depth. Nothing so dramatic as thrashing or gasping, but unmistakable signs that whatever dreams she skimmed were not kind.

By the fourth such startle she had begun keeping her breathing shallow, as if refusing to descend far enough to dream again. But, eventually, she reaches the limit of how long she can pretend the mattress is tolerable.

With a soft exhale, Jasnah pushes herself upright. Her hair, ordinarily so immaculate, has flattened oddly on one side and rebelliously lifted at the crown on the other. She smooths it once, twice, then presses her lips together and smooths it a third time with far less patience. The result is no better. The state of her appearance prickles at her nerves like raw wool on skin. She hates this grimy, lived-in feeling.

She stands fully then, and crosses to where Verso has all but collapsed forward at the desk. There's a stripped-down sincerity to the way he's slumped, temple resting on his arms, humming something that barely qualifies as melodic anymore. Something tender steals over her as she witnesses how he's made good on his promise. Her sleep might have been poor, but it had felt markedly less...paranoid.

Her knuckles rap gently on the desk. A dull thock thock thock. Then, rather matter-of-factly:

"I'm going to find a sailor willing to provide a basin of water and soap."

elsecall: (018.)

[personal profile] elsecall 2025-11-29 12:40 am (UTC)(link)

He stares at her. She stares back, unflinching. And while she can't begin to guess what's happening behind those light grey eyes of his, she does kinda...pull a face as he chugs up to speed with the morning's first conversation.

Only to roll her eyes. Yes, no, he's right to call the sailor's hygiene into question. It doesn't bear explaining that uhm, actually she only needs a hunk of something whose constitute axi can be coaxed into becoming soap. She'll start by asking for soap, though, because she'd rather not expend the stormlight if she doesn't need to.

Gathering her hair back into the scarf she's been wearing any time she steps outside the cabin, Jasnah pauses and entertains his question. Sleep, huh? How did she sleeps?

"Not bad."

Relatively speaking. She still slept like shit — plagued by disquieting thoughts and dreams the moment her subconscious wrestled control away from her logical, ordere conscious. But, compared to other nights? Not bad.

She doesn't thank him. But she does flash him a tight-lipped smile before walking out the cabin door.

elsecall: (040.)

[personal profile] elsecall 2025-11-29 01:18 am (UTC)(link)

Oh, was there something else to say about last night? If he's waiting on a thank you then he'll be waiting a damned long time. Verso made good his word and rendered the service he said he would render. And now it's on Jasnah to weigh the cost-benefit analysis on whether she dares to partake in that service again. Not tonight, though. Tonight, the cot is his. Silently, unilaterally, she's decided they'll have shared custody.

She's a few feet past their door, paused at the foot of a narrow staircase up to the deck, when he invokes the status of their marriage. Jasnah turns, drowning at him.

"...Why do you say that?"

Oh. She really doesn't see the same risk as he does. But she's willing to hear him out.

elsecall: (008.)

[personal profile] elsecall 2025-11-29 01:51 am (UTC)(link)

Her teeth set hard and gritted behind her customary frown. Jasnah simply doesn't see the value in play-acting a beautiful, tender marriage when (to her mind) their existence is that much rarer than a simple, practical partnership. What is Verso expecting from their ruse? A love match? Surely that's less believable.

You could try asking, she prods. Although she'd been avoiding asking too many questions ever since the fuss yesterday. But she supposes this is a different kind of questioning. Less personal? More actionable.

After a sharp exhale, Jasnah retreats back in Verso's direction. She stands close. Close enough that they should be able to whisper and not be overheard. Close enough that she feels his body heat as a soft, slight contrast to the colder sea air tunnelling through the narrow ship corridor.

"Alright. How do you propose we should act instead?"

elsecall: (002.)

[personal profile] elsecall 2025-11-29 06:33 am (UTC)(link)

The sudden proximity — initiated by her, maintained by her — is something she weathers with what can only be callled neutrality. Jasnah clearly isn't upset or bothered by the breach in what might be considered propriety. But equally, she doesn't seem to chase it.

Her expression is entirely too cool and unbothered when a rogue wave knocks her nearer. Storms, she even grabs him by the bicep to steady what might have been a full-on stumble as the next wave swells unpredictability after it's brother.

The results are almost (almost!) laughable. Jasnah's thoughts are nowhere near Wema, Sterling, and the storm. Jasnah's thoughts are right here — curling around his 'suggestion' with a spark of confusion and a bucket of... something. Indignation? Frustration?

Anyway, she grips his arm and leans in and channels all that frustration and/or indignation into a single hissed question — asked inches from his ear.

"Do you think I dislike you?"

This time, she can't help herself from asking for the question she wants to ask. The one that, scalpel-like, hones in on the illogical shifting sand she sometimes glimpses between his words. Sometimes, listening to Verso was like reading someone else's correspondence. She felt like she was trying to scribble best-guesses in his margins, all while avoiding interrogating aloud the premise of whatever he's said.

Well. She's back to interrogating. He'd only suggest what he's suggesting if she's already failed to keep up appearances. Except in her mind, Jasnah doesn't have to fake liking him. She likes him. He's interesting and useful and can actually hold a conversation with her that doesn't make her want to tear her hair out from boredom. She figured that was obvious.

... Wasn't it obvious?

Edited 2025-11-29 06:42 (UTC)
elsecall: (001.)

[personal profile] elsecall 2025-11-29 10:53 am (UTC)(link)

Objectively, she knows he's right. She knows it because two years ago aboard the Wind's Pleasure she'd given Shallan what ended up being her last lesson. That lesson had been on on authority and perceptions of power but objectively she understands the same principle applies to any assertion.

You say I have authority as the sister of a king. I do. Jasnah has told Shallan. And yet, the men of this ship would treat me exactly the same way if I were a beggar who had convinced them I was the sister to a king.

So! Yes! Jasnah understands the principle. She understands it intimately. After all, her often carefully arranged appearance adhered to that principle. What she doesn't understand and where she doesn't agree is that she doesn't believe she's given the sailors any reason to doubt their solid Alethi marriage. The illusion she's been casting against their perception feels utterly realistic to most marriages. Hasn't it? Her parents. Elhokar and Aesudan. Even Lirin and Hesina, the tower surgeon and the wife whose name she stole!

Jasnah's grip shifts on Verso's arm. Half stability, half stress ball. She has him sort of...caged against the corridor. It hadn't been intentional. Just a means of being near enough to speak softly, clandestinely.

But she keeps him there while she considers the others. The outlier marriages. Her mother's second marriage to her uncle; Adolin and Shallan. The ones that people whisper about and shaken their heads. Well, fair enough, they shook their heads but didn't doubt the depth of feeling involved.

Her grip loosens. Her hand travels down to take his hand. It's her right hand, her free hand, that interlaces with his.

"Let's try it your way." She offers. Although her tone of voice suggests she's none too confident in the experiment. However, to her credit, she is willing to experiment.

elsecall: (007.)

[personal profile] elsecall 2025-11-29 05:51 pm (UTC)(link)

As they step onto the deck — hands linked in holy matrimonial performance — Jasnah tests the contact the way a scholar tests a hypothesis. Her grip begins firm, deliberate, each finger placed with intention. She tracks the shifting pressure between their palms as though charting a physical equation: resistance, transfer of warmth, shared balance on an unstable deck.

A dozen paces later, she alters a variable. Her hold loosens; her fingers reposition. The grip shifts from constant to intermittent, from held to holding. She notes the difference with clinical acuity. Nothing nervous in it. Merely an experiment executed with a living subject she trusts to be at least clever enough to notice he is being studied.

They complete a slow arc around the deck — visible long enough to justify the fiction of a couple who rises early to admire the dawn before requesting water and soap.

Portside, the world is nothing but water and light—pink-gold under the newborn sun, impossibly wide and unbroken. Starboard, a faint smear of cliff holds the horizon steady. Jasnah finds herself unexpectedly relieved. Open water is too vast, too volatile, too indifferent. Systems bounded by land are easier to predict. And control.

She inhales, the sea wind tugging at her scarf and at the loose strands of hair that have escaped it. Then — without loosening her grip on Verso’s hand — she turns her head just enough to study him. Not smiling, not yet, but unmistakably focused. Whatever else may be true, he is at least the solitary object of her attention in moments like these. Intense and undivided.

She wants to ask him about his planet's oceans after the disaster he'd already described. Were there bodies of water outside the city? Tides, moons, winds? She wants to ask how many suns rise there, how many seas he's crossed (few, she guesses, based on his seasickness,) and whether they smell the same. But with a sailor shimmying down a mast scarcely eight feet away, she swallows every question.

Instead, she pitches her voice just loud enough to be overheard, just wry enough to pass for a wife ribbing her sociable husband.

"Have you learned any of the crew’s names?" she asks. "Made any friends yet?"

Dry, but not cold. A gentle implication that of course her gregarious husband charms every soul he meets. It maintains the fiction neatly — and besides, after last night's dinner, he may indeed know which sailor is easiest to approach for a basin, sparing her another conversation with the captain.

elsecall: (004.)

[personal profile] elsecall 2025-11-29 07:09 pm (UTC)(link)

Joke's on him! She hasn't held anyone's hand before. Not like this: prolonged and in public. Wit had never presumed except behind closed doors. And before Wit...well. Those experiments remain locked behind doors she has no intention of opening.

She flicks a glance toward Yann — young and earnest — and then back to Verso with a small, assessing tilt of her head. She knows perfectly well that he'd have just as much luck with this errand than she will. It might even be more efficient to let him handle it.

But she recognizes that if she hides now — if she stays conveniently absent — she will only teach herself the wrong lesson. She refuses to be someone who lives behind a closed cabin door because the world is unpredictable.

Her chin lifts a fraction, something faintly defiant in the line of her spine.

"Gemheart," she says, borrowing the endearment she'd used when they first embarked — dry, composed, but coloured with something warmer beneath the surface. "I'll be right back."

Only then does she withdraw her hand from his, careful, precise, like disengaging from an experiment she intends to resume later. She smooths her glove, squares her shoulders, and steps toward Yann with the calm, unassailable confidence of a woman who fully intends to acquire water, soap, and dignity in one fell swoop.

elsecall: (014.)

[personal profile] elsecall 2025-11-29 09:55 pm (UTC)(link)

Oh. Well. This is... inconvenient. Jasnah flicks a glance over her shoulder at Verso — pointed, narrow-eyed: did you aim me at this boy on purpose? She would not put it past him. Although it may be unfair of her to think so.

This — this wide-eyed, lanky creature blinking at her as though she's the first woman he's ever seen — is exactly why she prefers libraries. Whatever their theological baggage, the ardents at least possess the sense (or perhaps the terror) to avoid flirting and flattery in the workplace. And more to the point: most men learned early that "attempt to woo Jasnah Kholin" belonged on a list with "jump off a chasm" and "drink chasmfiend venom." Not that this poor boy was flirting. More like fumbling.

"Yann, was it?" She asks, her voice even, giving him a beat to marvel that she knows his name. "I suspect my husband mentioned it, but I wasn’t feeling well last night."

Only then — deliberately, a practiced stage cue — does her free hand drift toward her stomach. She hates this part of the fiction. Despises it. But she grudgingly acknowledges that Verso's spontaneous invention of an unborn child was, strategically, a stroke of genius.

"I'm still a bit unwell," she continues, mild. "I was hoping to find a washbasin. A stiff-bristled brush. Possibly even some soap...?"

The upward lilt on soap conveys she knows it's unlikely. So be it. If necessary, she'll try soulcasting it herself — she has never soulcast soap, but she is unreasonably confident she can bully the Cognitive Realm into cooperating.

Edited 2025-11-29 21:57 (UTC)
elsecall: (042.)

[personal profile] elsecall 2025-11-29 11:19 pm (UTC)(link)

Jasnah accepts the basin and brush with a graceful incline of her head — nearly regal, despite the miserable stub of soap. She notices the hair. She chooses not to react.

But when Yann leans in with that tentative, conspiratorial tilt — if you ever need someone to talk to — her posture stills. Not stiffens. Stillness. Was the sailors' suspicion really that far gone?

She responds to him with a composure so warm it almost hides the razor's edge beneath it.

"How generous of you to offer," she says. "But my husband is..." A beat — she searches for the correct phrasing, something that fits both fiction and truth. "...remarkably steadfast."

She lets the adjective settle. Steadfast. Not charming, not sweet, not romantic. Something firmer. Something earned. He'd earned it last night. All night.

"If I ever need someone to talk to, I have him."

A subtle praise. Not effusive. Not coy. But undeniably loyal in tone — the kind of tone that closes doors gently but irrevocably. Jasnah knows that if she ever needs someone for safe silence, well, she's got Verso for that too.

Her gloved hand adjusts its grip on the basin.

"But thank you, Yann," she adds, with an edge of wry amusement he's hopefully too young to decipher. "If I require counsel about maritime hygiene, I know where to find you."

And with that, she steps back toward Verso — composed, unbothered, and radiating the settled certainty of a woman whose marriage (real or not) is not up for discussion.

To really hit the illusion home, she offloads the entire armful onto Verso with a gentle, affectionate pat on his shoulder.

Edited (omg mobile tagging line break havoc ) 2025-11-29 23:20 (UTC)
elsecall: (008.)

[personal profile] elsecall 2025-11-30 01:33 am (UTC)(link)

Jasnah doesn't even spare Yann a second glance. She adjusts the basin in Verso’s arms with an absent, proprietorial tap — hold it steady, the gesture seems to say — and continues walking with him toward the quieter stretch of the deck. Back in the direction of their cabin.

"That," she says lightly, "is the exact expression of a young man who has been reassured that our union is not as rocky as he'd hoped.”

A beat. A tiny tilt of her head toward Verso.

“And. Yes. You were right. Certain rumours needed to be put to rest."

Her tone suggests she considers this basic maintenance, like patching a roof tile or tightening a saddle strap. Filling an inkwell. No emotional weight. No fuss. Just efficient fiction-management.

"If you must know what I said about you, you can ask him yourself."

She's used this tactic before. Leveraging his need to know such things against him. Go tug the thread if you dare, Gemheart. Meanwhile, she's going to wash up.

elsecall: (036.)

[personal profile] elsecall 2025-11-30 10:00 am (UTC)(link)

Verso's offer is expected, polite, and conventional. And yet the courtesy catches faintly in her chest, somewhere between irritation and something softer she refuses to classify. The irritation is irrational, untraceable, and immediately discarded as useless data.

The door closes with a muted click. She pauses, considers throwing the deadbolt — very sincerely wants to — but leaves it unlocked. Better not to impede his entry if it becomes necessary.

Alone, she steps to the basin and eyes the pitiful fragment of soap Yann had produced. It is, she decides, the exact shade of despair. Her hand hovers over it. Stormlight flickers faintly in the room's lanterns — a reflexive tug. It would be so easy to at least try Soulcasting something clean, proper, civilized. But they are far from safety. Emergencies are not theoretical. And she knows too well the cost of being caught without stormlight to burn. So she chooses the wretched little bar — snaps it in half, keeps the less-offensive piece, and leaves the one with the embedded hair for...later. Or for Verso.

She peels off her safehand glove, sets it aside with deliberate care, then flexes her exposed fingers once — acclimating to the vulnerability, even in solitude. She wets the soap; it barely lathers. Thin suds cling to her palm, slipping between long, precise fingers.

Her hands first. Methodical, almost meditative. Then her face — brackish water stripping away smudged makeup and travel-grime, leaving her bare-featured. There's nothing to be done about cosmetics on a ship; she accepts that fact with a quiet, resigned exhale.

Next, she unbuttons the line of buttons from jaw to waist, lets her havah fall loose, and gives the rest of herself a brisk, efficient scrub. Hard, unforgiving bristles raise red lines on her skin. Cold water trickles down her ribs; her breath catches from the sharp bite of the chill.

Halfway through, she realizes she's humming. Clinging to a distraction as she tries not to think about why this ritual scrubbing is so important to her. Tries not to think too hard about why she hates the build-up of sweat and oils, like being left alone for days...So she hums. Just a fragment. A scrap of melody from Verso's midnight vigil — the one he restarted three times, hoping she slept. She cannot reproduce it accurately; her musical intuition is abysmal. But still it emerges, faint, tuneless, settling gradually into something steady.

When she finishes, she buttons herself back into propriety, rolls down sleeves, and slips once more into her safehand glove. Scrubbed raw, cleaned, recalibrated. She almost tells him through the door that she's done. Almost. But the ruse must remain intact; no husband stands sentinel like a servant. So instead she cracks the door, leans out into the corridor, black hair unbraided and falling in a heavy curtain.

Her expression shifts the moment she sees him — something like a quirk of amusement tugging at the corner of her mouth.

"I left you some soap."

Or rather: she left him the faint, philosophical concept of soap.

elsecall: (018.)

[personal profile] elsecall 2025-11-30 04:41 pm (UTC)(link)
— You know, even before he offers for her to just turn around, she probably shouldn't have been watching. But she does watch. She watches him groom the soap. She watches him say that word that he sometimes says when people ordinarily say 'thank you,' whether sincerely or not. She watches him eke out whatever lather he can, and...

And, oh yeah, maybe she should extend him the same courtesy he extended her. It's not that she was eager to see more than she ought to, but she was caught up in thinking through the various linguistic distributional tests that led to her conclusion about what merci means.

Without a word, she turns slowly on a heel. There's no shyness or embarrassment. No blush, no fluster, no anything except a sense of fair play and equitable treatment. Well, apart from the fact that she got the first rinse of the water and he's stuck with the second. She stares at the cabin wall and squeezes water out of the damp ends of her hair.

"Above deck, I wanted to ask," Jasnah's low volume fights against the acoustics of their cabin and the muted splashing of water, "if there was much travelling done by sea on those...expeditions."

Can't simply let the man wash in peace. Maybe he should have asked her to step outside.

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